I should just throw a hundred dollar bill into the wind and walk away... save myself the hangover.
I can't believe I wasted a google wave invite on her.
do you know how scary it is to wake up in a CATSCAN machine after a night of drinking?
We made a drinking game out of Project Runway. Gay guys are so fun.
he asked me if i would dance for him to make it easier for him to jack off. does that answer your question.
officially christened the dorm room by sucking my spilled drink off the floor. tastes like homee
The guys in the quick check just recognized me as the girl who bought rolling papers and whipped cream. This is the walk of shame on crack.
last night on the strip the guy screamed at you YOU GOTTA WORK ON YOUR CALVES.
I am the worst person to have nipple rings I'm hanging ornaments off of then and sending everyone a tits the season to be jolly
there is something very satisfying about getting tacos after hours of sex.
There's a super pregnant woman here complaining about back pain. I better not see a live birth in the hair care aisle
Jesus Christ. How the fuck do you not tell someone that your wife can see on the phone bill who you text and how many times ?
what could you have possibly accomplished by watching 6 hours of a mythbusters marathon
well, i added sex in a wind tunnel to my bucket list
You should've seen the look on the guys face when I demanded pho and a beer the second they opened. Obviously he doesn't understand hangovers
I told him. He hasn't said anything. Crying and holding cats is probably what is happening.
Randomize