Paddidles count extra in the back of a cop car
You stuck your head out the window to puke and got hit with a mailbox.
I came downstairs to find I had missed the 3some on my kitchen floor but not the pukefest or ER trip after it. This is what happens when the voice of reason is otherwise occupied
I have no idea. I think this is what happens when people take drugs in the middle of the day
Some drunk guy thought my knee scooter was the sexiest thing he's ever seen. He then proceeded to ask me about duck hunting and decoys...
I'm beginning to think the entirety of my appeal is due to the size of my ass.
Am I not being subtle enough by giving him a rainbow striped bong, during PRIDE MONTH?
My life is a video game called get the drunk princess back to her castle, thank you to all that participated
she stole my Timberlands and my Sublime shirt and left her heels and bra. this is war
He was trying to talk to me about standards while he had a french fry box on his hand like a glove and was using it to flatten his cheeseburger.
I have never thoroughly inspected the geometry of my nipples until now. How do I fix this?
My brother walked up to us as we were making out and was like "hey man, go to town!" and winked
You have better ratings than Crest. Only 4/5 dentists recommend it. You have 8/9 recommendation for your blowjob skills.
Pretty sure I was naked for most of the night.....success
I don't wanna see it, I don't wanna touch it, I just want it in me.
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