i was like the pretty and slutty 8th grade girl who goes to a party, gets wasted, and ends up having sex with a senoir
details?
alcohol + bed + penis = sex
worst night to have a conscience
Just saw Youth in Revolt. There are only so many times Michael Cera can lose his virginity.
Thanks for the birthday present, i had so much fun playing with it
Are you talking about my vagina?
We are the drunkest people in Toys R' Us right now
Fuck buddy has no power. Invited her over to use my shower. I love hurricaines.
I tried to say goodbye but you were hugging a trash can and I wasn't sure if you had clothes on
Im still alive. Just can't talk. Or move. No need to worry
I am the worst sexter. i actually told him .. if i had a penis, it would be hard right now. BTW thats a turn off.
I hope you dream of an avalanche of penises
Dude, you can't even imagine the trip, I actually thought that there were Care Bears sitting next to me at the bar, I'm pretty sure I started hitting on the pink one.
The two of us decided to throw a spur-of-the-moment parade and the next thing I know we're 4 miles down the road being followed by 65 drunk strangers
I bought a vibrating wall dildo with my tax return. You?
And then she proceeded to tell us that blowing your brother made her feel like part of the family. At this point you were still pretending to be a cat. Need I give another reason she can't live with us?
I'm eating cookie dough with a tongue depressor for lunch.
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