i just found my sim card.....i hid it in my tylenol bottle....i guess to ensure i would find it mid-hangover
Karaoke into a bottle of boones. dear summer in alabama, glad to see you again.
It wasn't the stripper that gave you the hickey but I just figured out who did
Clearly that person doesn't understand how efficient getting drunk and working out at the same time is.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I feel like I just gave a blowjob to a freight train.
Please come back. She just stuck her bloody band-aid to Zach's face, has a fire extinguisher, and is talking about tornados hiding.
NEW INFORMATION meech found me passed out on a bench outside.
I would have been very attracted to her had she not been reading me my Miranda Rights
Someone with the Instagram name "hymenbreaker" just liked a photo of me and my grandma. I feel ashamed.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Would you judge me if I made John grow a bush while he is in Cancun so he doesn't cheat on me?
Sitting topless in my room drinking wine from a box... It's good to be back at school
I was orgasming and dying of laughter at the same time. I think I've found the One.
The man built me a fort. Of course he got laid.
..needless to say, i got fired. But I'm in the parking lot tanning on top of your car... so its not all bad.
Thanks for going with me today. It’s been a long time since I bought bra and panties because of a guy
It’s called “shopping for lingerie” and it’s one of the many exciting and sexy things that follow a divorce, along with sexting, sleepovers, and orgasms
But, our next lesson is picking up a younger guys at the bar!
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