you started crying about dinosaurs being extinct
that's why i woke up holding that dina girls hand
she's a dina-saur
Sending me a thank you card for letting you fuck my sister was completely inappropriate
well shes beginning to earn a reputation as "the girl who tries to bone her hook ups in the ass with a pickle"
Dude shes not that fat. Plus, last night I probably would've done it too.
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Would you even take no as an answer? I have a feeling you see it more as a challenge.
Hahaha wear something that says i'm here to party but wont go farther then a handjob.
That was the #1 scariest moment in my life. I have full trust in you, I let you bite my penis for god sake.
Hearing them have a conversation is like listening to water buffalo have sex. Awkward and scarring.
So Bodhi just sent me a pic of someone's balls with a message that says "I hope you all have a ballin' night." I don't even know what level of friendship to call this anymore.
Oh my god.
The ballsiest level.
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I just did a shot of Jameson and two shots of cuervo. Note: this is the moment things went down hill
I'm eating Swedish fish out of my boobs and watching SOA.. There is no way your Tuesday night will be better than mine.
I just got offered money for pictures of my boobs
I accepted the offer
you bet i'm gonna rock his four-foot-two world.
That guy u hooked me up with kept calling me james while were doing it...
Sorry. I was preoccupied thinking about penises
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