Hilbilly word of the day is cedar, example....I knowed she ain\'t got no panties on cuz I cedar cooter.
is it sad that i can masturbate and get my big O just from thinking about a Tiffany engagement ring?
she told me her fantasy was her as a 55 year old cook at a truck stop who smokes a pack a day, and I was the 21 year old illegal immigarnt prep cook.
I had a new years resolution not to be a whore anymore, but I think I'm gonna wait till 2011
Just before going down on me she said, "I need a hairband for all of the jobs I'm about to perform."
The straight man in me wants to hit on her. But the gay man in me wants to compliment her on her awesome outfit.
I'm trying to have a "pick me up from my house so I can get completely annihilated night" any takers? Cmon people this is what friends are for
Rick Santorum just suspended his campaign. Lets celebrate by watching gay pornography together.
YOU'RE HIGH AND AT THE GYM OF COURSE YOU FEEL WEIRD
My thighs feel like glass
I've gotten 2 singers numbers, a 6'5 dude has promised to take me to Oktoberfest, and I spent the night w a pilot named Zeus who looks like caramel tastes. Also I sprained my thumb punching some guy I named 'hater'. I love Nashville
She said it was unconventional for me to yell "Shazam!!" when I came inside her.
You were drunk at 5 You went to the dining hall and cried because your brain and fingers weren't working. Your RA came up to you and suddenly you became sober. I was very proud of you.
Started out playing table tennis then ended up fucking him on the table. Happy cinco de mayo
It's just a friend who is recently single and I'm going to heal his broken heart with my vagina
How did I end up in some random dudes car?
Some guy came up to you and asked if you knew how to drive stick.
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