party started at 10. cops are coming to shut us down now and its 11. i already lostmy underwear and im wearing a sparkly thong on my haed. this has to be some kinda record.
that shirt you're wearing that says "officially single" makes me think you'll be that way for a really long fucking time.
last night was fun... but i spent all morning tring to get the candle wax out of my chest hair. We did use candles last night?
If I had a nickel for every time my parents threatened to stop paying tuition I would be a very rich man. Rich enough to pay my own tuition.
He kissed my cheek and I could smell it the whole way home like shit
I am intoxicated and cannot bring you a burrito. However, if you want to bring ME one...
this blows. i told the guy at the bar that i was the DD and it was like i just announced over megaphone that i had genital herpes. no one will talk to me now.
there's a sledge hammer in the bottom of the swimming pool... so whatever happened last night was probably awesome
And by "got a tattoo" i mean i got a tattoo in the dorm bathrooms with a guy using his cousin's tattoo gun.
Well I'm just gonna sit here naked in this chair and whatever happens happens
if you just come over, i will entertain you
arguing about the color of your bong does not count as entertainment
I just want a whole pitcher of margarita and a headdress from party city and sit around and look like a fucking indian princess.
No memories of receiving this. Or of getting home. Or of apparently developing a taste for marmalade, which I assume is yours because I have literally never eaten it before. It's all over the kitchen. And my phone. And in my hair. Oh god I wish I wasn't on the train to work. X And sorry about the kitchen x
There are two guys here arguing over Pearl jam and Nirvana. 1991 wants its argument back.
Last thing googled on my laptop last night was vagina chaffing. What the fuck?
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