you didnt say anything until i brought it up today. i guess i misjudged your maturity.
I guess I misjudged your gender.
How was last night?
She looked like Delta Burke in her fat Designing Women days ... and she just left like 2 minutes ago. Right after breakfast.
My mom is wearing Ed Hardy. There aren't words.
She got her phone back last night. And the first thing I sent her was a picture of me pooping in a culvers bathroom
how did he go about obtaining bull sperm?
APPARENTLY giving your friend one of your shoes so that you avoid the no shoes no service rule makes you drunk...
was i strangled at any point last night? or was his dick just that long
he was alternating between taking bites of butter and bagel. he said it was easier than finding a knife
He woke me up at 3 am kneeling on the floor pissing and yelling, then he passed out and stole my comforter. I want a new roommate...
I'm afraid you are becoming too bourgeois with your switch from boxed wine to bottled.
Well, on the plus side, the hospital gave me a shirt that says "Makes a bad ass look good"
Topless dodge ball cldnt top that
I decided staying home, watching porn and masterbating was a much better choice than the gym. And I was right.
You ask too many questions when I'm blowing you. You're like a dentist asking how my day has been during a cleaning.
I know but we're going to blackout city so it'll probably be warm there
Randomize
