Does having sex in the men's bathroom on the boardwalk count as having sex on the beach?
just jacked off in the bed i was conceived in.
We played Russian Roulette with a revolving Nerf gun. If you shot yourself in the face, you had to drink.
I'm gonna make this happen. You think it would be too forward to text him my room number with turn by turn directions straight to my crotch?
This is so stupid. Now I have to call the party planner and tell her that the break up party is off. They decided to get back together.
Saw a sign earlier "Domino's Lava Cakes $3.00" and I thought of you. This text brought to you by thing I don't need to know about your sex life.
deryk tried to steal your screen door and i think sam and brent are duct taping lauren to the diving board.
I don't know what kind of soup they made, but it smells like condoms.
I feel like it'll be a success as long as she doesn't end up dead in a ditch. There has to be a line somewhere.
He said the last thing he remembered thinking was: 'Why is this vagina spinning?' Too drunk sex is no ones friend.
Would you be mad if I just used the argument "I'm allowed to say that, my best friend is a lesbian"?
Never. I'm proud to help you win arguments.
I was cracking open beer cans, throwing them off the roof, and yelling "FRAG OUT!"
How do I ask where the Jello shot cups are at Walmart without sounding like white trash?
I'm hungover laying in my moms bed watching Space Jam.. Adult Life..
No he doesn’t answer my texts except for like on New Year’s Because like I was fucked up on New Year’s and he said happy new year and I told him the same and I called him dragonslayer and you can’t really recover from that
Randomize
