You don't get off work for this? I feel genuinely bad for you.
I'll have a beer when I get into the office. Yes, I hide beer in my work frige.
he sat in the bathtub shirtless yelling in gibberish for 40 minutes. funniest. stoner. ever.
It took us hanging out like four times to kiss. Id like to fuck you before I'm 30
I am soup sandwich. I have been at dAnce party
Just woke up with my keys in one hand and cheesecake in the other.
he may be homeless but his dick however is not... anymore.
It was one of those "wake up holding a random metal flower" kind of nights.
You know, I've never slept in a rug with anyone before you
Tranny group. Dance off. Horse hair and dicks swinging. I. Cant. Unsee. This.
I have poison ivy on my dick
WHAT
Yeah well you try taking nice pictures while you have pizza crust lodged in your throat
When i was tripping hard i was banging Jeff's roommate and her room turned into Hogwarts
Also when we were banging i thought my high school librarian was perched up on top of the stereo like a gargoyle but it ended up just being her cat
I don't think I used nearly enough fucks in my reply to convey the level of fuck him.
You were having sex very loudly, so I felt it necessary to blast the Thong Song, bust out the trusty old airhorn and walk in on you. MY BAD.
Is it good porn? Or is it more of that fucked up Cabbage Patch Doll porn you made us watch
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