office poll is still running 100% that Spencer Pratt is more disturbing than David Carradine's death
its like an ocean threw up right in your lap
i just realized i have an entire drawer dedicated to the clothes of guys ive shacked with...
we are going to smoke at least three blunts before we go see Cloudy with a chance of meatballs. I'm going to have my mom make us spaghetti for when we get out so can your mom make those spicy meatballs? I thought I'd give you 9 days notice so everything's perfect.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
State Street has never looked so beautiful than during my walk of shame.
Just scheduled a cocaine deal around my drug counsler appointment. Why yes, thank you, I do enjoy the irony that is my life.
He passed out on the patio with nothing on but his boxers. So we put our beer caps on him. Yeah he woke up with a polka dot sunburn.
she "accidentally" hit me with her car, its almost as if she know im fucking her boyfriend.
...that's why he's not doing anything with his life except breeding geckos
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
This might sound awkward, but can I borrow a dildo for class?
You are going to be so proud of me, I'm wearing underwear AND tights. That's two layers more than usual between my vagina and the world.
After I was arrested and in the back of the squad, she lit a cig. I politely stuck my head through the glass opening and asked for a drag. She instantly slammed my head back, blew smoke at me and shut the glass. My view on state trooper chicks is forever tainted.
Of course not. I'd be offended if you didn't bring my boobs into casual conversation.
He sent me a dick pic, and it had smeared lipstick on it. So I sent him the pic of my tit with the hickey ring your brother gave me.
I really wanna treat my body good. Because i plan on doing drugs
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