OH RELAX, IT WAS PITY SEX.....
I either just heard my neighbors having sex or she really agreed with whatever he was talking about.
now I regret adding my aunt on facebook. she remnded me today on my wall about the importance of checking my stools for blood since I have diaherria.
you were crying because peter frampton wasnt your dad
I should hang a sign above my bed that says "get hard or go home."
Its like fucking yourself in the head with a weed strapon
You wrote me a letter and I cannot make out anything you wrote except the last sentence which says "tell the wolf ill meet him at sunset and that I'm sorrry"
This whole night would have been avoided if the liquor store had air heads
Its not that I'm getting free haircuts... Its just that she is paying for sex with haircuts...
I made him ride the giant pony statue in my friends little sisters room before i let him get in the bed.
When I got up in the middle of the night, puked in his trash can, and snuck out the front door, I pretty sure he knew it was over.
What happens at the gay bar stays at the gay bar. Except that I sold my panties for $100. People should know that.
I hat to flip my "days since last bad decision" chart back to zero. So...yeah. Sigh.
Say whatever you bloody well like; you don't know the true meaning of life until you have smoked to a Sade cd.
Turns out he's just a recently divorced IT guy. Not a wizard.
Randomize
