Do you think you have hit the lowest point in your life when you find yourself actually condisering watching the movie "Gigli"?
So after THIS dui, I've decided to stop driving. Not drinking, just quit driving.
All four of us managed to throw up in the same bathroom at different times during the night. I think we'll get along great living together.
and i'm going to kill you for what you did to my nipples last night. of course i want to hang out
Was that your vagina? Received a text pic from a number I didn't recognize. Shaved, so no hair color cues. But it looked like your lips.
Let me know when ur ready so I can throw up one last time then brush my teeth
Only Jon could get an entire commuter train to chant "Ride! Jon! Home!" to get a girl in bed.
Ok ladies its the usual spring break system. 5 for a guy, 10 for a non-lesbian girl and double points is its a group thing. Hottest guy of the day is an additional 15. GAME ON
I almost tried texting you with my pipe. Holy fuck this is good shit.
No, just kidding. But your faith in me to throw a lesbian bridal shower makes me think I an pull it off. To the LGBT bar!
Went to the lab to print and realized the guy next to me was the one we stole all the beer from last night..... Oops
I'm somewhere between crying and wanting to orgasm.
I'm slacking. We've been hooking up for months and I have yet to bang him while he's wearing the clown mask.
None of what you just said was coherent
I just bought wine at a gas station what the hell do you expect
eveytime i go to his house my cute clothes always get taken off what's the point of even wearing them there?
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