if i were to get pulled over right now, the only thing i would be guilty of is listening to 90's Mariah Carey
walk of shame with early morning football tailgaters. niice.
my drunk uncle just explained that turkeys are not gentle lovers... and no context doesn't make it better.
he suggested we appoligize to eachother. then do blow and painkillers & have ourselves a make-up party.
life is sad when you just turned 21 and youre doing late night rogaine runs...
I thought I would take a shower to wake me up but now I'm naked wet and stoned laying on my bed instead of just stoned laying on my bed
we just finished a porn and sex toy shopping spree. this is the fun part of "being serious"
You paid a stripper $40 to choke me out last night.
he doesn't sweat normal. maybe that's what THC smells like coming through the sweat glands...
CSI Miami is on and the guy is trying to save this woman who got shot. By stripping off his shirt & belt. THE WOMAN NEEDS YOUR PANTS OFF TOO
I guess your brother-in-law will have his day in the sun tonight after you leave. By that, I of course, mean he's gonna suck liquor milk out your sister's tits.
Went home last night with a guy in a tutu, didn't know he was wearing a tutu until he threw it at me in the bedroom. God I love Halloween.
I just got winded making my bed. How do you think the workout plan is going?
Stories. There's stories.
MEGHAN YOU'VE BEEN THERE FOR 20 MINUTES
I was simply suggesting that you really should try coke bondage sex.
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