I think my favourite thing about cubicles is the fact that I can pick my nose at work
Apparently I signed "I love you" on my bar tab last night.
dude are you gonna smoke tonight? my day was shit and I wanna get high
worker bees can leave....even drones can fly away....the queen is their slave
nevermind....I'm on the way
I seriously just found a rose petal in my vagina.
I hate cuddling. I also hate when people breathe. Which he did, a lot. So he can go to hell.
Im laying on the couch wishing someone was here to pour wine in my mouth. I need an alcohol IV
Broeke and glass. I feel so and. Appilogixe in morbing.
6 tequila shots, 3 kamikazes and 1 rumplemintz.. The next day I puked in my office trash can while doing payroll. I may have to dock my own pay for lack of class.
She has this wild look other eyes like she wouldn't be afraid to commit a felony.
He posted a picture from Senor Frogs. I don't remember where that bikini came from and my sombrero is PERPENDICULAR. Safe to say it was one hell of a day
I had to switch coats with someone at work because you can see the giant sex choke bruise on my neck. Being kinky is hard.
Also, you think turning 23 is bad, I just ran into the guy that gave my chlymidia
Getting high with your mom, but thinking of you!
Accent: check. Hot body: check. 8" dick: check. Feeds me biscuits in bed after rampant sex: check. Should I continue with my "Why I'm not coming back to the States" List?
You where banging on the wall asking us where we hid the door...you then crawled under the deck thinking you'd be safe. I told you to eat the nachos before the party...I told you.....
Randomize
