I want the hot one, scratch that. anyone.
She was drunk and kept trying to talk while I was in her mouth. It sounded like the teacher from a Charlie Brown cartoon!
Sometimes I wish there were a little bird hiding that would periodically go, "creep-per."
I'm bringing poparts in case anyone gets hungry. The trek to frat row is strenuous.
If I go there, please come with. It will accelerate the lesbian rumor but be totally worth it.
You stuck a chicken finger in that stripper's clevage and said "Keep this warm for me.
I ended up at these random girls' house they are smoking weed out of a gun
I hope it's socially acceptable to wear a mesh one piece into last call tonight?
WHAT KIND OF GUY JACKS OFF TO A PICTURE OF A BUTT WHAT IS THIS THE 1980s
You would only karaoke to Spanish songs, but sang with the accent of the french candle stick in beauty and the beast.
My trash can accurately represents my weekend: Bojangles wrappers and magnums.
At one point I was convinced he was a snake and was going to eat me And I just accepted it
HE BEAT A GUY WITH NOTHING BUT RAZZLE DAZZLE AND HIS FABULOUSNESS
YOU ARE STRONGER THAN YOUR VAGINA
Apparently I gave a guy a hand job on the dance floor. ON THE DANCE FLOOR.
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