I'm so horny!
I'm so hungry
WHAT A TERRIBLE REPLY!
For your pussy...
I woke up this morning under my fitted sheet and my legs through the sleeves of my sweater.
I'm outside your house...sorry I feel like I don't need formal invites anymore.
after last nights cooking expirments i have lost all faith in the fire alarm battery
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Things found in my vomit last night: cell phone, Von Hayes rookie card, a boot, my dignity
all i know is that each time we woke up we were at a different chinese restaurant. help.
Dude, didn't you know? Its balls out wednesday.
I'm not holding out much hope. She met me in a nighclub when I was arguing with the cigarette machine
He's worked out some sort of arangment where all three of them are dating each other and they've all moved into an apt. with two king beds pushed together
A true beacon of hope in these dark times
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Apparently from about 3-5AM I was consoling that crying stripper about her life choices.
i did nothiing wrong other than not tell that kid his whole back was covered in puke
you were so blacked last night that you jumped in the lake fully clothed, then just went back to the bar and walked around like you weren't soaking wet.
My New Year's resolution is to chill out on the group sex. At least with my friends anyway.
Which one have i been cheating ON and which one have i been cheating WITH if i met them the same night & have been dividing time equally?
So, is Canada considered an excessive distance to go for a booty call? Asking for a friend...
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