My mom foundout about my dui nd just called me to come home. I just took acid like 30 min ago. Wht should i do?
i felt like we were having sex on ultimate fighter, and people on the outside kept yelling ELBOW ELBOW! KNEES KNEES!
I didn't realize he wasn't circumcised... it looked like the Unibomber...
Just witnessed a circumcision at clinical. i suddenly feel a sense of reconciliation over every guy who's done me dirty...
You both must have been completely wasted because every once in a while we would hear you both stop and start singing to each other. At one point it was taylor swift.
her night didn't end so well, both of her boyfriends got arrested... together.
is it cool if i crash at ur house this weekend again bro
yea dude but i wld bring a sleeping bag or something just in case. or u may just have to shack up with a woman or 2 cuz we hav 10 girls visiting/staying over at my house.
how did u manage to make sleeping with a bunch of girls sound like an inconvenience?
I Can't even believe I threw all my pizza rolls at her, I mean not only did i ruin a good meal but now I dont have anymore
they had to take the Corona's out of the fish tank because they wouldn't fit with the mini replica of the roman coliseum in there. so we drank the Corona's. does beer have an expiry date?
I have a 16 minute video of you talking about your life. We are calling it your Anthology sponsored by Steel Reserve
I had lunch with him today and quietly mourned his wasted good looks on such a disappointing set of genitals.
I don't care how hot she is, her cat has pissed on me twice.
I finished OITNB and broke it off with my fuck buddy in the same day. It's going to be a rough week
How is someone going to pee on the floor two days in a row? Fuck this place.
I know we're not on great terms here, but I need to know if you're still available for sexual activity...cause if not I need to get going on a work-out plan.
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