If i come over, it means nothing
it's just weird having a massive boner in the morning when you could have used it the night before.
I guess calling a coworker a lesbian sea cow is some kind of violation.
I decided that not getting a job after college is gods way of telling me I will make a great housewife
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
so I'm coping with getting the "I'm not over my ex" bomb dropped on me by getting drunk and yelling at people while wearing a purple princess hat
The pigeons can smell the fear
Wtf
Discovered that a nalgene holds an entire bottle of wine. Going mobile. Come find me.
All three roommates are gay and in women's studies. Ive already been informed that all penetration is rape. This is not the college experience I signed up for.
Okay we're getting vodka and coming
Okay. Joe has my machete attached to his belt
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Ok there's 63 pics of you jerking it on my camera from New Years. The time stamps say it took you 40 min to get there too. See a doc, your only 22.
No he's here. We were watching Harry Potter stoned as shit and he fell asleep with his head in my lap. I'll figure out what to do with him after Harry gives Dobby the sock.
Just streaked campus for a bottle of patron...maybe you're right...I might have a drinking problem...
I don't know who's more excited for you to come home. Me or my vagina
I just had all of the sex. All of it.
I feel fine lol. I tried climbing a tree but the branch broke and I got arrested.
Randomize