I'm gonna start referring to my vag as my ladygarden
My kitchen smells like failed pina coladas.
I learned much from the teen babysitter: I can light a cigarette in a microwave.
we watched a tutorial on how to do guidette makeup
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Lucky for you, I found your phone.....Not so lucky for you, it was in the bottom of your vomit-filled trashcan.
These guys are walking up and down the hallway yelling, "Yo, is this the floor with the unisex bathroom?"
They were going around the house breaking things and screaming "Not my house!"
Bouncy castle Catalina wine-mixer race for the cure. It will be as fun as it sounds
Smoked a Vape in the library status: completed
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I let a naked juice spill down my leg for like 30 minutes bc i thought i was hallucinating that my leg was cold.
We convinced the Dj to let us play musical chairs...... I won by the way.
Sorry bro I thought you were kidding. If I'm actually jerking off I usually said "Just a sec getting dressed" or something
I had jack at 8 am= instant drunk
You don't know weird until you've had a musical wet dream about your older brother.
We are back but we are listening to stairway to heaven in my car. Amy is air drums. Be back when it's over.
Randomize