dude your alot more fun to hang out around now that your addicted to coke...but seriously you need to stop
turns out the guy i was dating because he was a cop was not actually a cop. i learned this as he got arrested by real cops.
i'm crying at olive garden. i've hit rock bottom
She can't drink and she can't smoke weed. She might as well be dead to me.
also. he gave me a foot massage during 69ing when i got a cramp. he's a winner.
I'd really appreciate it if we could dress up as pilgrims and indians for the thanksgiving eve bar crawl
you were cooking a hot pocket with a grill lighter what did you want me to do
Instead of medicine they should just give ecstasy. Also I'm tingly and can't find u guys. A gay man just said he loved me... :( / :)
How do i politely tell him his dick looks like it went thru a meat grinder?
It was close. I was the girl scoping out where all the garbage cans were located in the class just in case.
This is why you don't heavily drink before 2 midterms.
A dude I dated in high school just put a status about National Coming Out day. I checked his relationship status. He is dating a dude. Hello, Friday.
Hey, you can never be fully sure you're straight until you jerk off to gay porn
I should be in a better mood, I just went home and had a quickie on my lunch break.
I had a sandwich.
I have just discovered the land of milk and honey. and by milk i mean vodka and by honey i mean tequila.
Drunk on wine at my parents house watching "RugRats In Paris". Comeatmeadulthood.
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