Ok let me ask a question, does aderall make women less apt to have sex?
Cause it just destroys penises
Was that inappropriate? I can't gauge these things anymore
Just met a synchronized swimmer, can you imagine the things she could do in the water
Legs for days
Harpoon that
Can't remember why I called but it definitely had something to do with Lou Bega
i paused nhl 10 while i jerked off and it was like a crowd was cheering me on
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Last night you told her she was rocking the beer gut. Still wondering why you have that black eye?
Did I tell you that you looked cute last night? I looked at the pictures. I lied.
Clearly I understand physics better when I'm on cocaine
throwing up turkey will be a nice break from throwing up ramen
We're drinking vodka. Wine is for people who have to wake up in the morning.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm going out with a guy whose nickname is Shark Week cause he'll eat anyone. I'm very excited.
His cat must have been laying on his dick, because now my face is covered in hives
He was having this drunk emotional breakdown and I was just trying to cheer him up but instead fell and dumped the whole pickle jar on me
It was cool though because he was fine afterwards and somehow I convinced them I did it on purpose...
Sometimes I wish I lived alone because there would be no one to judge me if I wanted to have whiskey and popcorn for breakfast.
You invited these random guys into your apartment that you met in the hallway...& then you started screaming at them to get out cause you didn't know who they were.
We lost. I'mma go home and drink more and do a face mask and wonder why it is that god put me on this Earth to suffer
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