i can juggle bunnies
cool
on fire
Apparently 151 is to me what spinach is to popeye.
You came on your own forehead. Just wanted to remind you that.
yo your bro wants to know what time he got home and were you hosing him off
i woke up to something itchy on my head. it was his mustache. he fell asleep face-plant style on the side of my head. WTF?
The cop that got shot in the dick is here, let the entertainment begin.
You having your own car has severely reduced the amount of blowjobs I get.
I can't decide if I'm depressed or if this is just what life without a bidet feels like.
Yo this huge scar on my head from the car accident is truly a vag magnet. Probably because I'm telling people I was attacked by a mountain lion and killed it with my bare hands. But hey when life gives you lemons, you use them to get pussy
My car has a permanent smell of sex to it now.
the sex was good. her showing me pictures of her 4 year old daughter afterwards was not.
It was like the icing on a beautiful fuck boy cake.
he told me he didn't like my name so he was going to call me Casey instead
Butt Stuff 2016 unites us all
We get up to three toppings. Dignity is not one of them.
Randomize
