Wow so rude I was trying to have an orgy later but whatever
I think having sex with you would be a great treat for us
you guys got to bein so kosher and go with the flow
I told him to come back in 5mins cause i needed to take a few more shots before i could talk to him
Now there's vomit covered trash all over the front lawn. I feel accomplished
I couldn't walk, so he carried me all the way home; and then I told him that I wasn't drunk enough to fuck him. Poor kid.
FYI, your girlfriend is on her way to the ER. She tried to balance a bottle of jack on her chest. Smashed toes, blood all over patio. Call her, kinda funny though.
Definitely just puked in this corn maze. Families are staring.
Come on Nikki god gave you a vagina for a reason, so you could tell guys what kind of shots to buy you
Almost bit the guy's hand who sits in front of me because he was stretching. That. Bored.
i feel like when you brought up the possibility of you getting pregnant the sexting is over
I called you a cum goblin in my voicemail. I stand by it.
And besides a nice relationship, I just really want to get laid damnit
Okay but look at his jawline. I NEED TO RIDE IT.
I shouldn't have to tell you to stop throwing knives at me.
Nothing much. Just taking shots of tequila before I go get a bikkini wax. You?
I have post one night stand depression
Randomize
