he kept looking at my chin until i asked why, then he just said he was making sure his balls didnt leave a mark.
is it bad that while shopping i looked specifically for clothes that hold their form after taking them off and putting them on again and again?
it turns out vodka filled condoms arent that funny
I'm out of vodka and money. My semester is officially over. The way I see it, my finals are just forms I need to fill out in order to leave campus.
It's always a surprise to see what songs I shazamed and downloaded last night while we were drunk at the bar.
I've eaten cheese dip for three consecutive meals. I think I need to branch out.
I'm watching i used to be fat. I've been doing crunches for the last half hour yelling at the slut on tv to stop crying and do crunches.
the beer staff turned into a beer spear way to quickly
Hne relally is a cite oerfect gome. Nes awddddddddooooome.
Like real life can suck my metaphorical dick right now.
I just threw up all of my lunch in the Barnes & Nobles parking lot. Rockbottom tastes like a veggie burger, in case you were wondering.
Whatever. I'll take my new fine ass dick sucking nails elsewhere.
I'll accept that I'm a woo girl. Just not the drunk cowboy hat wearing bar mongering twat bag type
I'll probably just end up banging you in your parents marital bed,in their honor of course.
I remember that. We went to taco bell looking for pizza.
Randomize
