he sent me a naked picture of himself. things got awkward really quickly. but on a positive note he shaved his chest
why is pumping your own stomach in your searches on youtube?
Ok I won't set anything on fire if you wear pants all night. This is a bet we're both destined to lose.
Then, he just started shoving orange pieces in my mouth as a chaser
Welp I just blew a load probably the size of a small pond if not a lake
Who the fuck is this
The guy who just got ate on True Blood had the same balls as you.
I am pretty sure we beat baby seals over the head in a past life. That is why we are being punished.
So I've discovered that being hungover at 25 feels the same as being hungover at 24. Happy Birthday to me.
I love you too! Remember NO alcohol or weed at my residence because of legal ramifications.
You were definitely drunk. You gave him an otphj in front of everyone.
just pleasured myself to USA hockey beating Russia in the shoot out. god bless America.
I'm pretty sure NORMAL roommates don't have to hide each others sex toys from their fuck buddies.
All I wanted was a couple of orgasms before work, is that too much to ask?!
what do you mean he's functionally heterosexual
she told me id be a great addition to their lesbian community and shes giving me sex eyes from across the room. come get me NOW
Randomize
