therell be strippers and coke right?
no strippers. just coke.
i hate this fuckin recession
i just posted a lake picture of you with a dead fish in your mouth. happy july 5th.
I just bought a large Pizza and Xanex in the same store...my night is complete
bad to tell him im pregnant over fbook chat?
i hate this class. from the way they're all staring you would think they've never seen a girl in basketball shorts, heels and sunglasses.
I really need to get laid. I'm telling at least 10 girls that I love them tonight.
Odds are at least 1 out of those 10 girls will be as crazy as you and will be into it.
i'm sick of coming in second next to bourbon.
I heard liver failure is in for 2012 anyways
You called to teach me about fire safety, meowed a whole bunch, said "I hope you are not on fire" and hung up.
Coming to you live from the floor of my office..
I don't remember where I was but I remembered that I hated everyone there
Stop calling him just to say, "my vagina misses you."
She wanted a dick pic so I sent her brett Favres dick pic then she asked why I have pictures of old men's beautiful dicks
That's how pantless uber rides happen
He ate me out in the passenger seat of his Range Rover in a Tim Hortons parking lot. I could hear “oh canada” on the radio from a nearby school as I came. Most patriotic orgasm ever!
Randomize
