so I found out that he is the older brother of a friend of mine from high school
awkward
no it got awkward about 40mins later when he invited me to stay the night...with him and his girlfriend.
he was going down on me when he saw the warts...nevertheless he told me he had to pick his sister up from school. why does this keep happening to me???
Just watched my manager erase "we've been 2 days wo an accident" and change it to "0" these ppl are too high.
I'm gonna laugh so hard when we're both married with families
That statement alone makes me laugh so hard.
Is YOLO really just a socially acceptable way to say you enjoy putting things up your nose?
BTW my friend remembers her as "the one with the pronounced chin"
My new hangover cure is going for a haircut, just so the stylists give me a scalp massage during the shampoo.
That certainly explains the nine times your hair has looked different just this last month alone.
Had to sacrifice my vibrator batteries to the thermostat gods. I had a dirty dream and also almost a heat stroke.
Is 28 too old to get fingered in Centennial Park? Asking for a friend.
"I'm pretty sure all our toasts were to Ben Afflecks penis last night."
He does have a nice smile. I also like to think he has a nice penis, but that's just a prediction.
It's a sexual break up. We maintain a friendship and leave any and all sexual attraction out. It's not hard, having a baby is harder than that.
This feels more like a conference of all the people I've fucked in the past year.
I'm really stressed out right now.
I think you're confusing "stressed" and "sober".
Oh the sweet dreamless sleep of drugs
You? On what? Why?
Randomize
