Pride was great cause we really can now appreciate how far we've come as gay people!
Doll, if you're still fucking strangers behind the WeHo Sonic while high on E then we've come as far as 2003...
Girls don't like it when you cum inside them and then discuss baby names.
I just tried to put my feet in my slippers and found cans of beer in them. Christmas in fucking july.
My spanish teacher discovered you can watch spanish music videos on youtube. Guess what were doing in class today? Michael Scott Spanish 101
i am officially better prepared for a hangover tomorrow than i was for christmas.
she tossed me in the back of the car and said "god gave u the gift of life and I wanna swallow it"
the orgasm was like being thrown to the other end of reality, so getting a nosebleed from it wasnt too upsetting at that point
I hurt. I blacked out in a onesie. Reevaluation needs to happen.
But is that really the name you want to scream out during climax?
The night got interesting when the random guy next to us handed us a bottle of champagne and the rest of his ciroc bottle. When we asked why he did it, he proceeded to point at his friend who face planted the floor.
Landen experienced Greenville for the first time last night. He was awaken by 2 cops and 4 EMS guys this morning in the bed of that truck that is for sale at the swashbuckler carwash, said he was trying to walk to waffle house... Greenville- 1, Landen- 0
Can my mom come with to the bar? Prince just died and I feel like I need to take her out to cheer her up.
Sorry I've been a slutty nightmare this week
National tequila day this year falls on a Monday. I've never been more disappointed in my life.
Dad danced on top of the bar with me last night. And has a video of me doing a beer bong.
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