I was hoping we just happened to wake up naked and I hadn't fucked him.... no such luck.
so i turned around to do some reverse cowgirl when he said that this was such a better visual for him. Bad compliment or serious insult. i cant tell
just wrote a 6 page paper on my blackberry. including 3 sources. college is teaching me good things so far.
No need to get angry I'm just tryin to get my door back
Getting my nails done with Diana... I'm going for the keep your friends close and the girl who's dating the guy you want to fuck closer
When this bachelor party is over and your life is in ruins, you have my permission to die.
Breaking into his house to steal the sheets I'd drunk pissed on before he got home was not how I wanted to be spending spring break
I have a cracked rib, no way in hell I'm bottoming for him tonight!
Signs of a stoner: trying everything in your fridge topped with peanut butter to seek satisfaction.
I found you laying in a field of grass near the trail I jog on in the morning like a drunken Bambi.
Taking care of drunk people fulfills my need to be a mother
I'm telling you, this vagina is really making the rounds lately...
Well, I got drunk and told my family about what I expected sexually after a good first date.
i told someone my fallback plan was to be a slutty bartender and i needed the practice as i straddled them to pour a shot
Do it!! We better have a duck by the time I get home.
Randomize
