I reminded them that I didn't puke and I cleaned yours up! So huh!
THE PICTURE OF PEPPERMINT MOCHA MADE ME WANT TO TOUCH MYSELF
and i was just like oh shit i'm getting felt up by a 15 year old
he definitely had sex before you were fully potty trained.
it's graduation. he's gonna get congratulations slash emotional i cant believe youre leaving me sex.
I got a second ticket last night for drunkly using my one call to order a pizza and get it delivered at the police station
Sometimes things go your way and sometimes you get hit on by a fat drunk girl.
Was that you I seen riding on the top of a cab? Way to start the new year
If he survived pride he can survive a gay bar
I don't send those kind of pictures unless the recipient has already been up close and personal with it. I don't give previews, but I will provide recaps.
It's Breast Cancer Awareness Month!!!! What random hook up should check my tata's this year?!?!
literally just tried sending to someone a video of me jerkin but my phone was connected to Apple TV and it literally just played on the tv in a full room and I'm actually about to shit myself
Visibly drunk girl eating alone at a souplantation just spilled salad all over her body. It was me
Just remembered that I got laid thanks to my glow in the dark Batman belt buckle. Need to wear it more often.
u ever get horny for food. i ordered a bunch of crepes and its doin it 4 me
Randomize
