i wish that high-me and normal-me were two different ppl so that high-me could thank normal-me for setting out a feast before smoking
I wish that high-you wouldn't text me stupid shit at 3:30 in the morning
dude i just heard a girl tell another girl 'what part of im trying to get laid tonight dont u understand?'
needless to say i wont be back home tonight
All I remember is taking a bath, puking in the bath water numerous times while trying to wash myself and I must of eventually given up
This girl just swallowed a pealed banana whole. I'm not worthy.
My mom ate salad out of the vodka bowl
5am update: in a toga seeing triple made out with both sexes
I had to physically pry the rocks out of your hands so you wouldn't throw them at the guy with the cowboy hat. You probably would've missed anyways.
Its like bringing all that milkshake to the yard and I'm a diabetic and can't have any
EVERYTHING IS DISNEY. Even my sexting can lead to Disney.
Let's make an agreement. No drugs until you finish all your homework. I'm hiding them as we speak.
Was the picture of her twerking on a fake plant sufficient?
Get off the floor, put away the cookie dough, get ur shit together Scott.
I need a beard to bite.
When I type "sleep" my phone suggests "with Trevor". My phones an asshole.
Blueberry probiotics greatly increase to the masturbation experience. Try it dude. It’s all the rage
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