after we had sex last night he told me he smelled like my vagina. and then he said that if his roommate had a vagina he would probably smell like it. because "they hug weird and shit."
Want updates from david's night out drinking? If so text back DAVID to this number. Std rates apply.
eating kraft dinner with my face. no forks.
You were sitting on the filthy kitchen floor eating a packet of grated cheese, and you were crying because you couldn't find any cheese.. I'd say our party was a success.
The fuck-me-pumps were hot, the XL hoody kinda ruined it.
I thought that wasn't a thing ever since she showed you her vag on the dance floor
I mean I love some drunk compliments, but he just wasn't up to my low standards.
You yelled to anyone that tried to help you "I have a burrito, what else could a girl want?"
He told me we shouldn't hang out because it would be weird and then snap chatted me a picture of his dick
last thing I remember was someone walking in on me sitting in the bathtub listening and singing along to Britney spears "Till the world ends" on repeat.
Do you find Darth Vader masks attractive?
Hypothetically speaking - is it bad if you get cut off at an airport bar at 11:30am?
yeah, i thought because of the nature of his job he would have been better at it, but i guess there's a difference between a bagpipe and vagina
Highlight your past hook-ups. You've been stabbed, shot at, run over, and chased down the road...no you can't bring new bar bitch over here!
Dude she has a friend!!!!
Moms passed out wet and naked in a rocking chair again....
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