Blew in her face. She is Pissed. Yahtzee. As she brushes her teeth.
just as he was about to cum he started shouting "I THINK I CAN! I THINK I CAN!" over and over again.
it's like, God thought about making her pretty then changed his mind at the last second
I pulled some girls weeve trying to pull the stop cord on the bus
Thing I said while arguing: I want to be single again so that I can have pizza and dick rained down upon me.
Pulling out all the stops on being a lady.
My mouth taste like pussy and my dad noticed. Hahahaha
I no longer exist. I have transformed into a puddle of sex.
I don't know but this 12 year old kid is soaking up all of our bad morals like a super tampon on the second day of my period
You FaceTimed me at three in the morning while you were peeing. Your eyes were glazed over and you showed me your bellybutton.
Well... I got her number now... I think she is a dish best served drunk
I shaved an Xmas tree into my junk.... I placed your present underneath.
He was gunna drive a half hour for a makeout sesh. Time to take the diapers off and learn about the wonders of the penis, dude
I'm about to eat a 2month old weed brownie I just found in my lax duffel bag. will you answer if I call you in like an hour and a half
I should probably apologize for licking you last night since you drove me home, but I stand by my decision
That confirms what we've all known all along. I'm a bad gay. I have no fashion sense.
Randomize