There's too many weed/neon/felt Sublime posters in this room and someone just put on a Hunter S. Thompson movie. Save me, now.
She was lying in bed moaning while eating a Snickers and masturbating.
i just looked up and i was like omg ballsack and then i didnt know what to do
i looked up his schedule, waited outside his classroom, and handed him the receipt for plan b
What happened on tuesday that a stripper knows my full name?
Handjob with gloves on results in friction burn. In case you've ever wondered
HOLY FUCK COMFIEST CHAIR EVER
How do I go about messaging a girl on a dating site whose little sister I've had a three some with...?
I've spent all afternoon taking and editing selfies. The life of a bimbo is truly tiring.
We had sex on his grandparents floor... the taxidermy deer was staring at me the whole time!
And you are going to be so turned on by my batman skills later
I went in for a high five.. He went in for a kiss.. Today is a good day
I would be down to associate sex w taco bell
I can't go to Fassler and not immediately think about you licking a guys wife's butthole in the family restroom
There is a baby in my apartment. What the fuck happened last night?
Randomize
