so I'm never txting u again after today...
y?
cuz i don't wanna see it on blogspot :)
ha...too late
dude, you're never picky with who you hook up with, have a little dignity
nah man, chicks are like pokemon, gotta catch \'em all
next person that tells me Facebook is a professional tool is getting kicked in the teeth.
I woke up to them arguing over who would get my morning wood. Oh, and I was dressed as Santa.
What part of "you pissed in the tent" do you not understand?
Girl next to me in class just said to her friend "and I haven't even cried yet." Challenge accepted
Yea. Some girl set a laundry machine on fire. She's not getting married.
Got drunk and passed out flintstone vitamins to everyone at the bar. I'm just so god damn motherly
Oh and yeah that does count as public urination.
I accidentally sent my dad a very explicit Star Wars fanfiction and he replied with "That was great!"
It's hard not to feel like a terrible person with bruises on your tits.
VIVE LA RESISTANCE
Oh god, what now?
I don't care. It's wine Wednesday get your gameface on.
Wait. How did I get engaged last night?
I am the image of restraint, it's why im just hungover and not in the hospital
Randomize
