we have officially mastered the walk of shame
96 perecent sure i just took a shower with socks
There is still throw up in my sink from before break. God I missed this place
It's 10am. I'm hungover wearing a flyers jersey and a phillies hat and eating a cheesesteak. I'm not the only one. Best city ever.
Maybe it's the vicodin, but all I wanna do is hunt wild hogs.
U can find me on my couch hungover eatin tuna evaluating my life
im actually so stoned and hungover i feel like a bag of jello stuffed into a human shape
I would totally lead with that as a line.'So, I was on Legends of the Hidden temple as a kid.. Your place or mine?'
So far I consider it a great summer because I have had to buy Plan B a total of zero times
In my defense, there are at least three ways to die doing that, and I'm still here. America, Fuck Yeah!
Well... This is my last night at the resort. So far, the only thing that has been in my vagina is sand.
WHY IS THERE A FUCKING DILDO IN PLACE OF MY GEAR SHIFTER IN MY CAR?
All that stuff they told us in middle school about drugs being easy to find was a bullshit lie.
I have had flashes of 69ing, a strawberry flavored condom and begging him to sleep naked.
I’m a little confused...we were told by Cheeto Jesus and his minions multiple times that we would stop hearing about coronavirus the day after the election and, yet, I am still hearing about coronavirus. Is it possible they lied to us again?!?
Randomize
