I dont kno what was worse. Waking up 2 a guy next to me thinking I got blackout or realizing it was your boyfriend.
Where did you get a picture of my penis
just watched her puke in her purse and put it back on the bar. then half hour later put her hand in her bag to get a pen to give me her number. I bet she is game for anything
Who was that guy I met at your brother's house who had to get stitches in his ass?
I'm confused are we getting high or did someone actually die?
I know you`re my best friend, but when i wake up with this bad of a hangover and no memories of last night, i dont want to see your tits ad my background.
Well, no one has ever described you as a perfectly balanced individual
Everything smells like vodka and bologna. WHAT DID YOU DO?
I was wondering how I got the burn marks on my boobs and then I remembered....
The baked potato bra?
You told me you had two boobs that want to be naked for me. I'm just following up on your request.
Btw I don't have words to express my appreciation at how many times you've had to be on a dirty bar bathroom floor for me in the past two weeks
I couldn't stop laughing at the fact he was cutting lines with a sears card. What 24 year old has a sears card?
Let's get the cat blown out
If I had your ass I would rule the world
Yes, the maid of honor did just deep throat the mic during the toast. How do I follow that?
Randomize
