I think, one-on-one, Paul Rudd could be very threatening in like a REALLY good way.
As im putting my laundry in the machine, i find a solo cup and a pong ball that i signed babe ruth
What happened on tuesday that a stripper knows my full name?
in mid cry she says "I can be a whore if I want to"
he swears he got herpes from a bowl of soup
At the hospital. Forgot we locked Eric out of the house last night as a joke. Hypothermia's a bitch.
I almost had to get my pinky cut off. Wow I'm so happy. We won beer olympics so i didnt hahaha
Seriously you have a sixth sense. You woke up out of a nap to tell us all to check the clock and it was 4:18. You're like the spiderman of smoking weed.
She just made out with a golden retriever. I'm disgusted and turned on all at once
I think they make you graduate because you get too old to go hard and become a risk. homecoming weekend wins again. fuck.
He put his name in my phone as David Hot Guy With Tattoos and I fell in love because that's what I was going to change his name to anyways
Wrong. I really wanted to see the movie. And she was on top of me like she was riding a mechanical bull. Who am I to complain? I live to serve.
Who knew that showing someone your boobs would make them stop crying.
Grandpa just whipped it out and started pissing on the way to the game stuck in traffic. I saw EVERYTHING. :(
“On a break” is implied when it’s a Russian chick dressed as Black Widow wearing Minnie Mouse ears
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