My milkshake brings 85 to 90 percent of the boys to the yard
I just told my doc I would like to talk about my drinking problem, but that it would probably get in the way of my weekend plans.
she just put all the cheese in the refrig to sleep.. and yes we did finish you bottle.
I haven't been this sober since birth.
Can we just schedule bi-weekly fucks and bypass all the bullshit?
I'm lost. Please come find me. I'm inside the I-270 circle somewhere. I can hear laughing.
Let's get one thing straight; we aren't in a relationship. We fuck and occasionally go to subway.
i accidenteley seduced the christian girl's brother so i dont think we can count on free church picnic food again
University has ruined us all. I just had to clarify the last time I had sex as "No, not at the party we crawled home from in the snow. It was the one where you puked off the balcony and hit the barbecue."
I ended up in bed with a man from London in a sorority wing I am not apart of. Tequila fucks you up
Side note: the physics of a guy my size and age getting laid in the backseat of a Toyota Camry are absolutely staggering
You told him about your cats? I told his friend to put his dick in my mouth, and you talked about cats!?
i refuse to sex anyone who doesn't get my lord of the rings references. no exceptions.
I don’t know if I’m nauseous or just disgusted with myself.
On the good side I got hit on by a cute college guy. But the bad side was having sex in a frat house for first time in 9 years
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