dude i just figured out that the tostitos sign is two people eating chips and salsa. being high totally pays off sometimes
I'm looking at pot farms on google earth. Google should be proud I found a real purpose for it to serve.
You're going to have to buy me a lot of drinks before the bee suit goes on...
Playing basket ball at the park with random people that showed up at 1am. the division of teams is based on what drugs people are on
We went to IKEA super baked wearing fake mustaches. You?
I know, I know. But we've discussed my friends and appropriate social behaviour, and I'm pretty sure topless karaoke was a no-no.
He's not replying to my booty call. Like wtf. You have ONE PURPOSE IN LIFE.
In the middle of our bar crawl last night we stopped to pet dogs at a dog park. who would let a drunk person bet play with their dog???
Our apt smells like hot shit marinated in oregano and cumin. No more taco truck dinner, fuck face. The wall paper is peeling.
Thank you for the legal advice. I hope I can pay you in blow jobs.
i’m just listening to christina aguilera’s “your body” on repeat and trying not to pass out at my desk.
You know you're too drunk when you start calling people out for unfollowing you on social networks.
This love triangle bullshit is getting out of hand. It's now a love polygon and I want out
No, it's like a legit blood drive. It's not just her out in some parking lot with needles and ziplock bags
What is it about fresh air and wanting to talk about penises
Randomize
