It's more exciting when they aren't single....and even better when you have to pretend that you just slept with their roommate while trying to do the walk a shame as their girlfriend comes marching into the apt.
Im not the least bit jealous of the life you lead.
So he saw that playlist i made with his name as the title. i think he's creeped out that I have 106 songs that remind me of him
All four of us managed to throw up in the same bathroom at different times during the night. I think we'll get along great living together.
ugh... I can't wait for campus to get back. Then everyone will have other things to try to have sex with besides me.
Alright, my brain isn't sure how to properly function on a Wednesday with no hangover and more than 3 hours of sleep.
Pretty sure the girl next to me in Chipotle just came out to her mom.
Technically my penis started a fight tonight
Trustme, don't ever look up when you're giving road head. It's awkward.
I think we need a list of things that are automatic NO's for dating a guy. Married, definitely a no now
I told the guy that if he didn't put enough pepperoni to earn the name " pepperoni feast", that I was gonna sue him for all he had. Believe it or not, that's all I remember.
can we for just one second remember that I played with a homeless man's rat at st marks?
I'm in the fetal position watching the little mermaid and trying not to die. When do you come home?
Congrats. You made me have an orgasm in Starbucks.
O was like, nah, fuck 50-50. My version of bi is that i'm 80% gay, 20% drug-addled decisions. Apparently he's straight on hallucinogens.
I CAN’T BELIEVE YOU STUCK YOUR DICK IN CRAZY!
Randomize
