I used a bag of wine as a pillow last night.
im officially scared..,i finally realized who my boyfriend reminds me of! spencer pratt
as evidence of my kitchen this morning my night involved alot of mustard and condoms
there was a guy here who managed to get his head stuck in a fishbowl. no, I don't fuckin know how
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
should we take a power nap before our cocaine gets here?
Dude they even gave me free lube for being tested! Best. Hiv test. EVER.
THAT stays in the CAR. And if one fucking person who was NOT in the car brings it up, I will KILL you. Thank you.
..So we should take it off Youtube?
Tell me why I'm at Target and this entire Spanish family is crowding around the condoms questioning which ones they should get
Im just a social blackout drinker.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Were playing beruit winners pelt losers with eggs
no dude I'm not doing anything bad to her...remember she's always the DD she has blackmail material on literally all of us
Literally this kid just told me he's not planning to live past 30. Then he hit himself with a frying pan.
High. As. Fuck. I thought the kid next to me didn't have an arm for like 2 hours.
Hahahaha I'm glad you woke me up with this text.
That's just how I roll. I drink, then tell people I'm either not wearing underwear or I'm training to be a stripper.
was having sex but got distracted... he instragramed a pic of his crotch
Randomize