i was so high last night that i actually googled "how to get un high"
if you ask that question again our friendship is over
Dude. Creed is coming in september.
We're no longer friends.
This guy just brought his piggy bank into the bar with him. Talk about corruption of childhood.
You need to tell your booty call to take some sudafed or something. I swear I thought you were humping Kermit the frog last night
There was a picture of him proposing on the night stand and their dog watched, but I can't help myself, his dick is just so perfect.
whatever. i don't care. i just want to be drunk wrapped in an american flag.
Her mom offered to give me a lap dance. I was a guest, I couldn't say no.
Dude, the chicks a procotolgy intern. Don't cheat on her. She knows where it hurts the most.
next photo in the 'cherished memories' series- Jess's bed. Note the vomit actually UNDER the pillows. shes a genius.
how is telling me how long you drunkenly fucked someone supposed to make me miss you?
Beautiful wedding. Beautiful bride. I got shitfaced. Came home and ate two corndogs. I'm still single.
Welcome to drink and talk like a Russian afternoon.
Pirate drinking day will be planned for shortly
I approve this so hard.
My Midnight Kiss was a Big Mac.. Happy New Year
I never forget a pussy, even blackout me gives me that memory.
There are twenty eight units in that building. There has to be at least one heterosexual in it. You can't have fucked your way through all of it.
Randomize
