i spent 15 mins trying to take money out of ATM with my drivers license saying, "what the fuckkkk" everytime it didnt work
Is it wrong of me that I wish I could be a midget for a day so I can give head standing up?
Sorry you called when I was puking in a cheetos bag
Well I tried to call you. I was convinced my body was made of wood. But the Xmas lights in my room helped
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
There are so many Jimmy John's employees here
Where are you?
Jimmy John's.
I think I ate my cheesy fiesta potatoes cup.
BTW my friend remembers her as "the one with the pronounced chin"
I just threw in a dip with a guy that superglued his fake tooth back in today. My life is complete.
Last night you made me help you pick the raisins out of a kashi bar and acted like it was the most important thing to ever happen to you or our friendship
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You tried to wave to Meg on Family Guy and got upset because she wasn't waving back
Fuck you and your widespread penis snapchat
I just want him to go down on me while I eat a burger. Is that too much to ask?
Look fucker, my sensibility and attention to detail is the ONLY REASON you're not dead now
Ahhh, the bane of our relationship.... His mediocre penis
I get so pissed when there is something that NEEDS to be made fun of and you're not here.
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