I wish I could be a nicer person. Or a more sober one.
That guy over there looks like a cartoon/action figure.
omg, i know.
we're too high.
the lady at Walgreens winked at me when i asked where the cherry chapstick was... damn u katy perry!
No vaginas are yucky and I don't think you're old enough to handle one yet
His shirt was in the kitchen sink this morning, I'm pretty sure my roommates know.
Only mom could turn an abortion day into a shopping day
he just asked if we wanted to go to an arts and crats club with him tomorrow. every day it becomes harder for me to defend his sexuality
I'm just saying, no one has ever made me laugh or cum as hard as you do. Sometimes at the same time which I didn't know was possible. Is there even a word for that besides love?
Bring the pizza ill bring the boundaries we can cross
This is stupid. I am not getting knocked up from fucking in his backseat behind a starbucks. I refuse.
I thought I was bad, the girl next to me on the bench was feeding a bush a hamburger and introduced me. Only at lollapalooza.
I wore his All-American medal during sex. I came in first that night.
I just want to say that I've always loved you and you are my best friend ever
You gave that creepy guy my number, didn't you? You really need to learn how to just say no, not interested.
Yep, you're going to hell.
I take on this great possibility with a beer in one hand and the girl I'm gonna fuck later in the other
so we have roughly decided that hes the dude all the chicks will bang in college, just so he will do their term papers
Randomize
