Already got asked if we're dating
What's the politest way to tell someone that you're only interested in them when they're naked, and even then it's just like a passing "meh?"
life lesson# 3: saying thank you on a subway really means "im not a native new yorker, so please feel free to touch my ass"
hmm. interesting. explain how you came across this knowledge.
i sneezed. he said bless you. i said thank you. he groped. i again said thank you.
Wish I didn't live with 3 girls so I could beat off in peace.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Then I opened the closet and then i found the babies
all i asked was if it was all the way in, and now im laying here alone. sensitive guys fucking suck
Her life is filled with shit luck. Its like mother nature is having her period and just taking it out on her specifically.
Here's how he asked the pregnant girl for a cigarette. Hey yo prego throw me a square. Not joking.
do you think this outfit says "I maintained my dignity this weekend"?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Well I can't message him and be like "hey I was behind you in CVS a month ago and I remembered your last name and DOB and looked you up on fb and added you so wanna hang out"
He came over in a blaze orange vest with a case of beer and a shotgun yelling about "Dove Season" then passed out in the lawn. There he lies
I think curling is the best thing to watch when you're baked.
At one point I yelled "THIS IS MY PENANCE FOR EVERYTHING I'VE DONE WRONG" and started saying Hail Marys
Do they still have sex clubs in San Francisco? Because that'd be an interesting way to spend Easter.
I'm giving drunk me full control of my body for the next few days. Please don't let me die.
Randomize