the bitch is dead man
YOUR DOG DIED?
no i meant my mom has passed out .. so i'll be over soon.
Operation extremely regretful is in full effect
I want to frame my negative pregnancy test.
I just saw an old lady yelling at a dead pigeon for leaving the oven on.
If she wasn't my friend I'd think she was a huge slut
So she just apologized to the fire extinguisher.
In class ... We were just assigned groups for the quarter... Remember that night we took shots from that guys pants? I now know his name
You should have hard cock pics on hand to send in the situation that you can't stop driving, pull out your cock, browse the countless pics I've sent you of my tits, get him hard and text a pic through. I mean, it's simple sexting ettiquette.
Half of my brain feels like I donated it to science and they basically just poured jack Daniels on it and put out cigarettes into it before returning it to my skull
I'm super stoned watching the vatican smoke cam. Come over.
I really just want to eat 20 mcnuggets and slap everyone with the box when I'm done.
Blacked out and showed everyone my nudes. They toasted to my nudes, and I got an outstanding ovation.
It got to the point where I was so drunk, playing rock paper scissors as a drinking game seemed like a good idea.
there are LEGIT cum stains on my ceilling. ON THE CEILLING!! you tell me how the relationship was.
You took the glass microwave plate and said it was the closest thing to a frisbee, let me know how that works out for you
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