Deadliest Catch is NOT foreplay
The whole way homeyou were flapping your arms up and down, and when I asked why you said you were trying to tell Tony Danza about the angels.
I know she was blacked out, but she looked directly at the toilet and said "we meet again"
Rachel and his cat watched us 69 last night. I pretended to be embarrassed the next day... But to be honest I like an audience
the creek. my friends left me at a party next thing i know im in a breaststroke relay race with a bunch of randos in the dark
The cop asked you if you had been drinking and you said you drank milk out of a cow.
I rememeber. I showed him the picture on my phone of me drinking out of the utter, right?
You picked a jagger girl up claimed her then walked out the door with her that was the last we saw of you
Apparently from about 3-5AM I was consoling that crying stripper about her life choices.
She dressed up in a sexy maid outfit for me, but she got mad when I asked her to actually do some cleaning.
You made me take a photo of you under the stairs at the bar. "Look I'm Harry Potter."
He blacked out and wouldnt drink anything unless he funneled it, so I made him funnel water
250 people in this lecture & my prof asks who already drank green beer this morning& is drunk right now. I WAS THE ONLY ONE TO RAISE MY HAND
I feel bad for her. If you sacrifice and have a chubby husband I feel that you assume he's not going to cheat on you....
its 2pm and were already starting beer pong...its gonna be a good night
You made me promise I wouldnt let you play "fuck fuck goose" with a 40 year old ever again.
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