Culvers...So Good
So good. The butter burgers slip right outta my ass.
im just gonna turn drinking alone on new years into a tradition
Let's create a 16 and pregnant drinking game
mom just found 19 empty wine bottles in my closet. i hate spring cleaning
Good cause the way I see it, we are down to DAYS left of college so we should have as much naked fun as possible. And Jenga really facilitates that.
a garbage man just dropped off my phone and wallet. he found them in the trash this morning.
i think i pulled off the nice guy thing too well. it just backfired later on when she thought i was actually nice.
That's cool, I just have to let the dogs out AND SO HELP ME GOD IF YOU TEXT ME BAHA MEN LYRICS WE ARE NOT FRIENDS.
You have to come over we all bought drinking hats. Mine has a turtle on it. Side note: somehow someone got their hands on 50 candied apples and we need to eat them...
Woke up with his dick on the side of my face, it's like he passed out mid-mushroom stamp.
why is my underwear the only thing i was wearing that smells like vodka?
I bruised my dick hopping over that fence last night
Needless to say, she forgave him, they're back together, and I'm seriously considering having a lesbian year.
He went down on me to the national anthem being sung by Jordan sparks. It was very patriotic of him
Well, thanks for not letting me sleep with anyone, but no thanks for telling everyone I have the clap.
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